Here are 10 things that will truly make or break your first date. Alone, each individual item on this list may not make much of an impact. But together they will turn every date into a spectacular one. Communication is key in all of these things whether they are physical, subtle or spoken. So, it is communication and finding someone who can communicate with us well, that makes for a wonderful first date.
Remember, relax, have fun, and show each other a good time!
1. Stay Positive
Staying positive is key. Negative emotions will only leave a bad taste in people’s mouths when they think back on the date. Of course, honesty and sincerity is important as well. So if something doesn’t go as planned, have a good laugh at it, and make a joke.
It shows you know how to handle yourself and have a great sense of humor. Speaking poorly of others or a situation should be avoided, and when they can’t be honest, and have a good laugh. After all, it’s the trials and tribulations of life that made you who you are!
This concept is often misunderstood as that which men do for women. But in truth is is about how men and women interact. Men? Show women the proper courtesy. Hold open doors, and chairs. Take her hand, and show her a good time.
Make her feel special, desired, and beautiful! Women, you should encourage these things in men. For without the right attitude, men will not respond favorably. Most men will naturally fall into a chivalrous attitude when the woman he’s with makes him feel good as a man.
This means you should have a good time with let him know in many ways that you appreciate him, and all that he’s doing for you. You should be warm and welcoming to him, for this will surely make a man want to do all he can for you, and give you the best!
Now, in this day and age, many feel chivalry is dead, and don’t make much of a conscious effort to look for it. However, we are subconsciously drawn to it. It makes us feel more masculine, or feminine. It allows us to shine, and show our very best, and it also draws us to others.
3. What to wear
Now dressing to impress is always something we hear. But what does it mean? Of course it’s important to look good, and wear clothes that compliment your body. But we should take care to wear clothes that look great, as much as we should select clothes that represent who we are.
If you’re a more modest person, who likes to take things slow while having a good time, a revealing party dress, while it makes you look great, will be misleading. Similarly, if you’re someone who likes to dress up and go out often, wearing some comfortable jeans and a nice shirt, might also miss the target. What you wear is about conveying who you are, in the best light. So keep it simple and pick something that suits you. Remember, all things in moderation.
Being comfortable in your skin and who you are speaks volumes about you as a person. If you combine this with making sure your date feels relaxed and comfortable too, then you have a recipe for success. For many nervousness is natural when we see something or someone we want.
It will help your date have a good time to see you are relaxed and comfortable. And when you take the time to make sure they can relax and feel comfortable as well, they will love you for it. Above showing that you can have a great time together, it shows that you care, which is a great thing to find out about your date.
When one or both people are nervous, it will likely end in disaster! You’ll fumble your words, miss the signs about how well the date is going, or what your date may want, etc. It breeds miscommunication, disinterest and doubt.
5. Masculinity / Femininity
These are the things that naturally draw men and women to each other. Women seek men to be strong, confident, and powerful. There is nothing more sexy to a woman than a man who can show confidence in his actions, good judgment, and consideration for those he’s with.
Men in turn, are drawn to women for their warmth, gentle natures, and encouragement. It is these differences that makes us attractive, and inspires the complimenting behavior in the opposite sex. It is a man’s strength and confidence that makes a woman feel and act more graceful and feminine. It is a woman’s warm embrace and gentle nature, that encourages men to be powerful, and strong.
It’s nothing new that women enjoy being complimented, but men do too. The most important thing to remember about a compliment is to make it specific and genuine. Boring compliment = You look pretty/handsome tonight.
Direct compliment = You look really dashing/elegant in that outfit (said while smiling). See the difference? A good compliment will make a person smile, and let them know you find them attractive and interesting. So, share a compliment every now and again, if they’re good you’ll get a blush, and sometimes more!
7. The little things
Pay attention to all the little things. They seem small in the grand scale of things but really show that you are paying attention to your date and care. Is your date cold, or hot? If they asked you out, have you showed appreciation for all the little things they are doing? Is your date nervous? Are they having a good time? Understanding the little things will help you better understand your date, and in doing so bring you both closer.
8. Who Pays
This can be a troubling and sensitive topic. In the age of equality, who pays can be a big problem. Women make just as much if not more than men, and are perfectly capable of taking a man out on a date. On the other hand women prefer to be asked and treated out to a good time. Men can often interpret a woman paying as a test or disinterest. So, how should it work?
Splitting a check is messy, and separates you as 2 individuals. So instead, it’s best to be considerate about what you order, and treat your date to something afterwards, like a drink, dessert, or something fun and entertaining. The difference between this and splitting the costs, is that it shows you being receptive to him paying, while at the same time, interested enough to treat him in return.
The act of splitting costs and bills separates you and your date into a “you, and me.” Where alternating who pays sets the precedent in defining you as a “we.”
9. Scents, colognes, perfumes
Smell is a powerful tool to draw and tease someone’s interests, as well as leave a powerful memory. It’s a proven fact that if you can engage someone through all their senses that it will leave a powerful and memorable impression. Popular scents are easy to recognize, but you’re not playing “name that smell.” You want to select a scent that suits you, a smell that entices you as well as your date.
You know you’ve got a good scent when people begin to think of you anytime they smell it. So take your time, it may not be easy but is worth the effort. Pick your scent wisely and that smell will be on their mind long after the date ends.
10. Good Night Kiss
The Good night kiss. Unless you’re a strong woman who has no problem pulling your date in close for a passionate kiss at the end of the date, you will want him to make the move. So yes, in this case it is a man’s job to read your body language and make that smooth sweeping kiss with confidence. However his action is dependent upon a woman’s behavior. It’s up to you both to create the mood. So, if you had a great time and want to seal it with a kiss, welcome him. Move close to him prior to saying good night and make lots of eye contact.
Simple subtle touching is ok at this moment, because it shows you are ready and willing. Once you’ve created that warm feeling that makes it so easy for a kiss, it will be hard for any man who has had a good time, and likes you to resist. The kiss is key and tells of things to come, so make sure to make it a GOOD ONE!